16. I am thankful for...

Today I've been very thankful for one thing in particular.

My boyfriend.

I am so thankful for all the things my boyfriend does for me. Tonight night I was having a really bad night. I have had a lot on my mind lately, and I was feeling pretty lonely. I called him up and asked if he'd come see me because I was feeling really down. He showed up with chicken nuggets from McDonald's with my favorite sweet and sour sauce, and he even brought me Gingerbread Oreos and milk. He was able to cheer me up a lot. It feels so good to know that someone is there for you, that someone will come right over no matter what is going on in their life at the current time. To know that I have someone in my life who is completely willing to drop whatever they are doing at the moment and come hug me and hold me for a couple hours just to see me feeling better than I was when they arrived, as they leave...that says so much. I am so thankful for my Garret. We have been through so much, but the fact that we are still in each other's lives means a lot. I read this quote once: "The couples that are meant to be are the ones who go through everything that is designed to tear them apart and come out even stronger than they were before. They don't give up on each other or their relationship when they go through hard times, even if its the easy thing to do." That pretty much sums up our relationship. I gotta say, I love the guy. A lot.

a birthday gift.

Hello my lovelies,
Today I plan to have a nice lazy Sunday. I don't have to work, and all my homework is done, so I have nothing to worry about. Garret and I are going out to lunch to China Buffet, and then we're going to hang out around downtown. & yes, if you were wondering...we are back together. I'm looking forward to a relaxing afternoon spent with him.
ALSO: It's one of my friends' birthday today! So my roommate and I decided to go out and get her a birthday present this morning!

We wrapped it up all nice and pretty. (o:

Got her a card and I even decorated the front of it too. (o:

Don't tell anyone, but it's a yoga mat. 

So now her and I can do yoga together!

I'm so excited, hopefully she likes it!

I'll tell you all more about it later!

xoxo

it's official...

Hello everyone,

I have big big big news for you.

*inhale deeply*

Garret and I, we're over.

*exhale slowly*

Yes, it's true. I know, I know, its crazy, and its very hard to wrap your head around.

Oh trust me. I know it is.

But it's the truth. And we all have to find a way to accept it.

No matter how much it hurts us.

Now, that being said, I have a few more truths to add before I close this post.

1. It was my choice.

2. I have cried every night since then.

3. I miss him terribly.

4. I worry more about him than myself.

5. I did it for the better.

6. My life is not over; but has just begun.

7. I'm afraid I'll be alone forever.

8. Right now I'm sick to my stomach sad.

9. But I have hope for the future.

10. & I'll be okay, eventually.

So, if you'll allow me to finish my ice cream now, I'm going to have to have quite a few more servings before this pain goes away. To be honest, all the ice cream in the world might not even be able to fix my heart. But that doesn't mean I can't try. And If it doesn't work, well, I'll go back to him, I suppose.

It sucks. And the more I think about it the more sad I get. But I'm happy it happened too.

Because now I have a chance to be my own person.

I can finally break free, and reach out, and explore a little.

I will finally be able to figure out who I am, and who I want to be.

And I will finally be given the opportunity to become that person.

On my own.

Even though I'm really sad this had to happen, I know I had no more chances to give.

It was just time. I can accept that some things can't be fixed.

I'm hopeful for my future.

I know I have so much potential and I don't plan on wasting any of it.

I don't have to settle for anything.

And I'm not going to.

Just one more big girl lesson I've learned.

Many more to come, I'm sure.

hit the bay with the boy.

Hello my lovelies.
A few days ago I was able to get my schedule changed around a bit so that I could squeeze in one morning with my Garret. We decided that it was a perfect day to go to the beach yesterday. So that's where we were headed. When we got there, we found out that we were right. The sun was shining, the sand was hot, and the water was amazing. I had an awesome time just laying out with my man talking, giggling, people watching, tanning, and swimming. Enjoy the pictures. (o:

☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼

My favorite drink for beach days.

Red bull.

☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ 

I love nothing more than to be hugged, kissed, and cuddled with 

by this handsome boy.

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ 

☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼

Oreo ice cream I picked up for the two of us. 

Such a yummy treat on a hot day.

☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ 

He's definitely doing something right. 

That's for sure.

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ 

☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼

Fresh fruit anyone? Mush melon or Watermelon?

Yum, both please!!!

☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼

   ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

All smiles when I'm with this man.

The one who cares for me like he's my brother

the one who protects me from the world like a father

the one who always stands at my side like a best friend

the one who holds my hand and kisses my forehead like a lover.

& yes, you guessed it: he's mine. Garret and Miranda; forever & always. 

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ 

There's nothing like...

...going out and acting like a lady, but letting your inner child come out for a short time here and there. I feel like Garret and I do this every time we're together. We know how to be mature. We know when its time to act like an adult, and when things are serious. But there is nothing wrong with forgetting your responsibilities for a minute and letting loose. Life is full of too much stress; never forget how to be the kid that you once were when everything was all rainbows and butterflies. I'm so happy to have a boy like this as my best friend and my lover. There is seriously nothing better than being able to act like a kid, a teenager and an adult all at once with the person you love.

Recipe- Sour Cream Softies

Good morning my friends!
Today I have a very special post for you. First of all, it is my very first recipe post, and second, I took the pictures and made the goodies with my boyfriend on our year and 9 month anniversary. It was such a fun time. So, if you're a cookie lover and you've never heard of these bad boys, you better try them out.

Things you'll need: 

  3 cups sifted all-purpose flour

1 teaspoon salt

1/2 teaspoon baking powder

1/2 teaspoon baking soda

1/2 cup butter or 1/2 cup margarine

1 1/2 cups sugar

1 cup sour cream (8 ounce carton)

cinnamon sugar

2 eggs

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

Directions:

1. Measure flour, salt, baking powder, and soda into a sifter.

2. Cream butter or margarine with sugar until well blended in a large bowl: beat in eggs and vanilla.

3. Sift in flour mixture, adding alternately with sour cream to make a thick batter.

4. Drop by by rounded Tablespoonfuls, 4 inches apart, on greased cookie sheets; spread into 2 inch rounds; sprinkle with cinnamon-sugar.

5. Bake in hot oven (400°F) 12 minutes, or until lightly golden around the edges.

6. Remove from cookie sheets; cool completely on wire racks.

Things I'm Afraid To Tell You.

I'm afraid to tell you that...

1.] I'm afraid to listen. Even though it might be best.

We've been together for so long. And I love you so much. Sometimes it just seems to everyone around me that I would be so much better off on my own; alone. I think sometimes that all of that negative thinking puts me in a mood, and then I start thinking the same way. Because of this, it is very difficult for me to ever know if my thinking is actually my own, or just my understanding of someone else's. They tell me things that hurt. No one wants to listen to that kind of thing. But at the same time, no family of mine would tell me that kind of thing unless they meant it, and they were looking out for me; trying to get me to realize what is truly best for me. My life is my own. So do not think for one second that I will let others lead me around and tell me what doors I should and should not open. I will make my own choices. It's just that I've looked back and thought to myself, why didn't I listen to my dad then? I would not like to look back five years from now and think to myself, why didn't I listen to my dad then? Especially if I can prevent it. It's a hard choice to make. I'm afraid to tell you that I may have to listen, after all. Only time will tell. Please don't let me listen to them.

2.] Prince charming has disappeared, but to where?

You promised. You said you'd do anything for me. But I keep asking, and you won't. I'm afraid to tell you, but I want things to be how they used to be. I want to feel happy again. I want to have a crush on you again. I want you to act like you did in the beginning. Before we knew we were in love. I want you to touch me like you used to: gently, cautiously, sweetly, needfully, and curiously. I want you to take my breath away. I want you to wrap me up in your arms and do something you only see in the movies. For me, all for me. Make me feel special, because you love me. You still love me, right? I need you to make me remember what it felt like. I'm afraid to tell you, but I will only ask so many more times. If you can't give me what I need, you force me to move forward; without you. Please don't let me move on.

3.] I worry that I need more than you can give me.

I need so much from you. I need you to remind me everyday that you love me. I need you to tell me. Even if I already know it, I still need to hear it. I need you to hold my hand, intertwining your fingers in mine; squeeze my hand gently to let me know you're there. Hug me when you see me and tell me how beautiful I am, even if I already know that's what you're thinking. Tuck me in, tell me goodnight, and kiss my forehead at the end of the day before you shut the door quietly and walk out to your car. Send me a sweet message before I wake up. Write on my facebook wall when you miss me. Act silly with me, because that's what best friends do. Take me on adventures, I don't care if they're near or far, spectacular or not, I want you to excite me. Surprise me, doesn't have to be anything amazing, but something unexpected, no matter what it is, it would do wonders. Dance with me, in the living room, the street, the sand at the beach. It doesn't matter where. Hold me, when I'm fine, when I'm not, whenever, all the time. Laugh with me, enjoy my company, listen to my terrible singing. Accept my stupid habits, no matter how dumb they are, no matter how much they annoy you. They're a part of me. Love my flaws, because they are a part of who I am as well. Trust me, because I deserve it. Listen to me because I want to tell you all about everything that I possibly can. Try things for me, even things you don't like, who knows, if you try you might learn something new. Be with me, become part of me. Be my best friend; the one I'm not afraid to let loose with. Love me; like no one else can. Remind me that you are my soul mate. My one and only. I'm afraid to tell you that I need these things, and you give me almost all of them about 50% of the time. Which is great, but I don't want to lose that spark. It's up to you to keep our fire burning. You promised you'd do anything. You promised. Keep your promise.

And most of all...

4.] I'm afraid to tell you that I will do whatever it takes.

That means with or without you. I am not supposed to find someone I can live with, but someone I cannot live without. I will do it. I'm convinced it's you. But if I ever feel that it isn't, don't think that I will hesitate to set out to find that person. You're wonderful, you really are. I truly love you with all of my heart. I probably will no matter what. No matter what happens. You will forever take up a huge place in my heart. I will do whatever it takes to stay with you. Everything in my power. I promise. All you have to do is keep your promises, don't let me believe what anyone else says about us, and do everything in your power to keep me satisfied with your never ending love for me. Everything will be fine. I love you. ♥

So very much my dear Garret.♥ 

picture and hour #3.5. / ahhh summer ♥.

Hello everyone,

Today has been simply amazing. If it was any indication of how the summer will go, then I am super duper excited. This morning I got to sleep in, in my bed with my new beautiful quilt from my aunt. It really is absolutely beautiful. I love it even more because it matches the yellow curtains I have and it brightens my room up. Then after I finally decided to wake up, I got my laptop running and I decided to play the Sims 3. I absolutely love this game because I can make people do whatever I want them to do. If you've never played it, you really need to. It is a blast. I never get bored with it. A little later I got up and around and ate some breakfast and got ready for my Garret to get here. Within another hour or so we were off to the beach enjoying the sunshine. The water was a little yucky, but it was too cold to swim in anyways. When the clouds came in and it started to drizzle, we headed to mackinaw for some icecream and because I had two beads to buy from the lovely PANDORA store to match the ones my Garret got me for graduation ♥ It was necessary because I have another bracelet to fill up now. Then we took off to petoskey and went shopping. Garret tried some clothes on in JCP and bought some new khakis, and I bought a new straightener and hair dryer and some clothes from MC Sports. We did look everywhere for a kindle fire, but of course everywhere was out of them. So, tomorrow Garret's coming over and if I can convince him, maybe after the beach we can go to Cheboygan to check if they have any. To finish off the amazing night, we had a late dinner at Buffalo Wild Wings. Yum.♥ & there you have it, my entire first day off.

My beautiful quilt. ♥

Our new spot on the beach.

Garret skipping rocks.

Working on a tan!

A very strange looking lady bug.

The scratches I got from a big dog.  :o(

Superman to cheer me up! 

Garret being a weirdo. (o:

Double spun wings because the staff at Bdubs loves us. Asian zing and honey BBQ. DELICIOUS!

There's nothing like...

...skipping school and laying in bed for a while, then getting up and drinking a nice glass of Grape Punch. Yum.

I am so sick of school at this point, and there are only 14.5 days until we are out for good, but I just don't know how I'm going to get through those days. I'm so busy, and there is just so much to do in one day. I have no idea how I'm going to get it all done. I spent the second half of Monday and Tuesday with my Garret, basically just venting to him and talking about all that I have to do and all that is on my mind. Then yesterday I left school early again and went to finish up my night class at the college. Today, I'm just kicking it at home and I'm gonna do a ton of homework and catch up on everything that I need to do.
Days like this I just have to take a step back and really appreciate the littlest of things. Without the little good things, there would be no point in continuing on. I look forward to life because of the little good things that come along with it. Thank you Grape Punch, for allowing me to thoroughly enjoy my morning.

almost satisfactory.

Today has been an absolutely fantastic day. I've done just about everything I could have possibly wanted to do in a usual, single day. I woke up early but was still able to sleep in. I blogged this morning for a bit. Then I had a nice breakfast of toast with apple jelly and animal crackers. After that I decided to play The Sims 3 for a couple hours. A little later I decided to curl up on the couch in my snuggie and start reading a book which I'll do a full report and prepare a speech on for my final English exam. Then I ate some delicious ramen. Halfway through the book I cleaned out the bathroom cupboards and took my nose ring out for the very first time (in almost two years (since July 2010)).

After I cleaned the ring and my nose, I did my face a favor by plucking my eyebrows and putting on a face mask for a good 15 minutes. Then I sat back down on the couch and finished my book, which was rather good. I'm verrrrry surprised that it was on the list my English teacher gave us to choose from. Who would have thought, Sherlock Holmes?!

After I finished The Hound of the Baskervilles I took a nice relaxing shower and I shaved my legs. I love shaving my legs; because I do it so rarely it just feels so nice and fresh when I finally get a chance to do it. Then I put on some lotion and drove myself 8 minutes to the good old Carp Lake store to treat myself for my accomplishments today with some lemonade and orange slices, which have been my favorite as of late. And for only $1.99 I was able to buy at least a two day supply of goodies for the bump and myself ♥

On the way home from the store I heard like five of my favorite songs in a row which never happens and was super great. Then when I got home I read a little bit of Dear John by Nicholas Sparks and shortly after took a little stroll up the dark drive way with my dog to see the full moon which will not be this close to the Earth for another 40 years.

It certainly is magnificent. My iPhone does not do it justice.

But it still isn't any bigger than my thumb or yours. 

Not here at home where I sit.

Not where ever you happen to be tonight.

No matter where we are, ever.

My God, it's been a long time... 

So my plans for the rest of the night, before bed, are to watch Remember Me, to text my boyfriend as he is getting out of work in just under an hour, and to sip pink lemonade until there is no more. Goodnight my lovelies. ♥