it's official...

Hello everyone,

I have big big big news for you.

*inhale deeply*

Garret and I, we're over.

*exhale slowly*

Yes, it's true. I know, I know, its crazy, and its very hard to wrap your head around.

Oh trust me. I know it is.

But it's the truth. And we all have to find a way to accept it.

No matter how much it hurts us.

Now, that being said, I have a few more truths to add before I close this post.

1. It was my choice.

2. I have cried every night since then.

3. I miss him terribly.

4. I worry more about him than myself.

5. I did it for the better.

6. My life is not over; but has just begun.

7. I'm afraid I'll be alone forever.

8. Right now I'm sick to my stomach sad.

9. But I have hope for the future.

10. & I'll be okay, eventually.

So, if you'll allow me to finish my ice cream now, I'm going to have to have quite a few more servings before this pain goes away. To be honest, all the ice cream in the world might not even be able to fix my heart. But that doesn't mean I can't try. And If it doesn't work, well, I'll go back to him, I suppose.

It sucks. And the more I think about it the more sad I get. But I'm happy it happened too.

Because now I have a chance to be my own person.

I can finally break free, and reach out, and explore a little.

I will finally be able to figure out who I am, and who I want to be.

And I will finally be given the opportunity to become that person.

On my own.

Even though I'm really sad this had to happen, I know I had no more chances to give.

It was just time. I can accept that some things can't be fixed.

I'm hopeful for my future.

I know I have so much potential and I don't plan on wasting any of it.

I don't have to settle for anything.

And I'm not going to.

Just one more big girl lesson I've learned.

Many more to come, I'm sure.